DoS jokes
What do you call a premature Chinese baby birth? Wong Tai-Ming.
What do moms want for Mother's Day? Replacement silverware.
Boy goes to Confession.
Boy: "What are you doing, Father?"
Priest: "It's called masturbation, and soon you will be doing it."
Boy: "Why do you say that, Father?"
Priest: "'Cause my hand is getting tired!"
-not my joke
Why do some couples go to the gym together?
Because they want their relationship to work out.
What color flowers do mama cats like to get?
Purrrrrrrple flowers.
Memes
What did the hermit crabs do on Mother's Day?
They shellabrated their mommy.
What do you call a mom that can’t draw? Tracy.
How do crabs honor their mom’s birthday? The shell-abrate.
Do you know why there are no pharmacies and pharmacists in Africa?
Because you can't take pills on an empty stomach!
What do you call a baby Mexican? A paragraph because they aren’t a full essay.
What do you get when you cross A-Rod with Chris Brown?
Cheater, cheater, woman beater!
What do you do when your cat's dead?
Play with the neighbor's pussy instead.
What do you call a woman covered in mud? A dirty dishwasher.
What do you call the inside of the ISS toilet?
Cosmic Brownies.
What do you call a house party for slaves?
An auction house.
What do the initials FEMA stand for?
Federal Erection Management Agency.
How do you know your sister’s on her period? Your sister pussy taste funny
What did the teacher say to the fat Turkish kid that always ate in his class?
"You could do with Ramadan lasting all year, couldn't you?"
What do a bike and a rubber duck have in common? They both have a handlebar, except for the duck.
A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. They’re appalled by his haircut, his tattoos, his piercings.
Later, the girl’s mom says, “Dear, he doesn’t seem to be a very nice boy.”
“Oh, please, Mom!” says the daughter. “If he wasn’t nice, would he be doing 500 hours of community service?”