DoS jokes
Where do boats go when they get sick? The dock.
Asian Grading scale: A- Average.
B- Half Average.
C- Stupid idiot!
D- FAILURE! CAN'T EVEN DO CALCULUS!
F- FORGOTTEN FAILURE! CAN'T EVEN GET A JOB AT MCDONALDS!
Where do you take Stephen Hawking when he dies?
The Apple repair store.
What do orphans need in order to mail letters?
Food stamps.
A Mexican magician says he will disappear on the count of three. He says, "uno, dos..." and poof! He disappears without a tres.
Memes
Explain Bear i hate you
When I went to the doctor, he pulled his wife in and said, "What do you see?"
I replied, "A fat bitch." He said, "Ok, your eyesight is perfect."
What do you get if you talk to a Down syndrome person face to face at close distance?
Soaked...
What do you call a hospital that's flooded with vegetable soup?
Go punch an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
What do you call a retarded fruit?
Mentally in-pear-ed.
What do you call a plane with no wings?
Sally.
What do you call a bulldog and a shih tzu? A bullshit.
What do you call a little boy with no arms and no legs?
Names.
How do you know when your wife is dead?
The sex is the same, but the dishes pile up.
What do you call six gay men at war? Rainbow Six Siege.
Where do cows keep their historical cultural artifacts?
In the mooseum.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter; he's not coming.
What do you get when you cross a cow with a coffee bean grower?
De-calf!
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wipe his ass.
What do you call anal rape?
Ass cream.