DoS jokes

Do you guys know what KFC stands for? It stands for kidnapping foster children.

What do you call meat in an oven?

Africa.

Joe: What do the Leafs and the Titanic have in common?

Ben: I don't know.

Joe: They both look good until they hit the ice.

If emo grass cuts itself for you, then what do transgender picture frames do?

Wanna know something the orphan could never do?

Wish anyone a happy Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.

What do you call a group of emo people?

"The Suicide Squad."

Why do you wrap a hamster in duct tape?

So it doesn’t explode when you’re fucking it.

If a Jewish kid has ADHD, do they get sent to a concentration camp?

Do you know what the secret is to have a smoking, hot body as a senior citizen?

Cremation.

Some people think jokes about child abuse are funny.

I'm not sure if I think that, but they do seem to hit different.

What do you call a disabled gang member? A crip.

How do you make a lesbian upset?

Give her a multiplication test.

What do you call a disabled orphan?

A left over vegetables.

What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?

They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.

My mum told me to stop telling the suicidal jokes.

I replied with: "Don't worry, suicide would be the last thing I'd do."

What do you call it when a white person beats a black person?

A KKKO.

*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....

What came first? The chicken or the egg?

Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?

Who taught the first ever teacher?

If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?

If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?

In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?

Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?

How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?

The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?

Is it possible to cry underwater?

If two left handers have an argument, who is right?

I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O

What did the house painter ask when he went to the abortion clinic?

"Where do you keep the cans of paint?"

A lady from the city and her traveling companion were riding the train through Vermont when she noticed some cows. "What a cute bunch of cows!" she remarked.

"Not a bunch, a herd," her friend replied.

"Heard of what?"

"Herd of cows."

"Of course I've heard of cows."

"No, a cow herd."

"What do I care what a cow heard? I have no secrets to keep from a cow!"

Man: "I know how to please a woman." Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you." Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "Your hair color is fabulous." Woman: "Thank you. It's on aisle three at the corner drug store."

Man: "You look like a dream." Woman: "Go back to sleep."

Man: "I can tell that you want me." Woman: "Yes, I want you to leave."

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?" Woman: "Do not enter. -OR- Stop."

Man: "Your body is like a temple." Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."

Man: "Is this seat empty?" Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man: "What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar?" Woman: "I hate you."

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?" Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."