What do you call a pen with no head?
DeCAPitated.
DoS Jokes
Why do emos like circles? Because they can hang out with them.
Three blonde girls are on an island, and they are much too far away from land to swim. They find a genie on the island who offers them each one wish. The first girl says, "I wish I was smart enough to get off this island!" So the genie makes her a redheaded girl, she cuts down a tree, makes it into a boat, and proceeds to row off the island.
The next girl says, "I wish I was even smarter than her so I don't have to do so much manual labor!" So she turns into a brunette and makes a sailboat and lets the wind take her off the island.
The final girl says, "I wish I was smarter than both of them!" So she turns into a man and takes the bridge.
What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?
Impossible!
Where do pedophiles go hunting?
Elementary schools.
💡 idea. Start a confidential organization that only recruits via invite. Stockpile heavy duty weapons in an si when the time comes we can defend America from any domestic threat. *just a silly idea*
What do orphans have in common with mute children?
They can't talk to their parents.
What do an Olympic silver medalist and a Catholic priest have in common?
A: They both come in a little behind.
What do you call an army of autistic people with guns?
Special forces.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?
A: A suicide bomber.
What did Cinderella do when she got the ball?
She gagged and took it like a champ.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell them to clap until they see their parents.
What do you call 2 homeless people throwing rocks at each other? "Pillow Fight!"
Grandpa's last words: "Why do you have a chainsaw?"
What do you call two redheads on Mars?
Locals.
What do you call a disabled person in a sauna?
Steamed veggies!
How do you make a plumber sad?
You kill his family.
What do you call a violent fish?
A smackeral!
Me: John, what did he do earlier?
John: Hold on, I’m trying to think.
Me: I thought I smelled poop.
Q: What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in front of a door?
A: Mat.
Why do orphans go to church so much?
So they can have someone to call father.
