DoS jokes
Q: How do you blind a woman?
A: You put a windshield in front of her.
What do old people and meth heads have in common? They usually trip over their balls.
Why do the orphans love going to the bakery down the street so much? Because their cookies are homemade.
How do you say "Brazier" in German?
Stop 'em from floppin' (German accent)
What do you call it when you rickroll someone in the LGBTQ?
You just got fruit-rolled.
Memes
What do you call a woman who aborted her quadruplets? A graveyard.
What do Olympic sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing. They fast!
Why do priests perform baptisms? So they can see children wet.
How do you keep a blind kid busy? Give him sandpaper and tell him it's a find-a-word. 😂🤣
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair on fire?
Hot wheels.
Top tip; if your wife asks, "What would you like to do to my body?" 'Identify it' is the wrong answer.
How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?
You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving. IDK.
Me: "Oh man, things are really happening for me! I have so much to do!"
Depression: "Lie in bed."
What do the twin towers and genders have in common? They used to be two, but now they're a sensitive subject.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
... family photo.
I decided that I'll end it all, but when I drove off, I remembered I forgot to do the dishes.
What do depressed people do when they’re bored?
They “Hang” Out.
Why do orphans use water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do a fat woman and bricks have in common? They both get laid by Mexicans.
What do you call a dwarf suicide bomber?
A party popper.