Roses are red. Watches are gold. Get on your knees and do what you're told.
DoS Jokes
What do you call a movie at Bill Cosby’s house?
Netflix and pill.
Why do people hate abortion jokes?
It leaves you with an empty feeling inside.
What do you call a camel stranded in the desert of Arabia?
A Shawarmano Cameldo!
A guy barges into a psychiatrist’s office and screams, “Doctor! I have suicidal tendencies! What do I do?!”
The doctor calmly answers, “Pay me in advance.”
What do you get when you cross a Jewish person?
Christianity.
what do you call an American looking at cloud shapes?
Oppenheimer
What do women and KFC have in common?
After you get done with the thighs and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.
Why do orphans always have the newest iPhone?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
What do LGBTQ folk and folk with scoliosis have in common?
None of them are straight.
It’s OK if emo kids always hang from the trees, but if we do it, it’s considered against the law.
What do you call lesbian sex during their period?
A blood transfusion.
How do you know it’s a gay guy’s birthday?
Depends how hard they blow out the candles.
What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while you’re asleep.
Why do orphans cause trouble at school?
So the teachers will call their parents.
A photon is checking into a hotel.
The bellhop asks him, "Do you have any luggage?"
The photon replies, "Nope, I'm traveling light."
What do orphans and garbage have in common?
They’re both in the street, and no one wants to pick them up.
A policeman walks up to a van with two priests and says, "We're looking for two child molesters."
The priests both look at each other for a moment and then say, "Okay, we'll do it."
what do you call an emo person who's not depressed?
dead.
How do you describe a redhead with bad teeth?
Gingervitus.
