DoS jokes
Why do midgets work at Tesco?
Because every little helps.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire? "HOT WHEELS"
What do you call a transgender person? Nintendo Switch.
Why do orphans use water for cereal? Cause their dad never came back with the milk.
Why do orphans always have water with their cereal?
Their dad never came back with the milk!
Memes
So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.
When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"
He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."
What do you call a murderer with two butts? An assassin.
What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD?
A trip without kids.
What do a blind person and an orphan have in common?
They both cannot see their family.
Why do orphans kill people so they can finally be wanted?
What do you call a blind German? Someone who can't Nazi!
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
What do you call a virgin lying on a waterbed?
A cherry float.
What do you call it when everyone of your friends makes too many dumb Covid jokes? A pundemic.
Q: What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
A: Neither of them get to see their parents.
What movie do orphans relate to? Home Alone.
Man: Cow milk is drinkable.
Other man: How do you know that?
Man: *smiles with milk all over mouth*
Other man: John...h-how do you know that!
What do orphans call family pictures?
A selfie.
What does Jeff Bezos do before he goes to sleep?
He puts his PJ-Amazon!
A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend."
The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better."
"Thanks Dad," the son says.
The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."