DoS jokes
How do you get Wacko Jacko to come inside your shop? Have little boys' pants half off!
What do astronauts eat off of? A satellite dish.
What do you get when you put 50 lawyers in a room with 50 lesbians? One hundred people who don't do dick.
What do you call a Muslim sleepover?
Osamas in Pajamas.
Guy: Do you know how to draw women's rights?
Girl: No, how?
Guy: All you need is a blank paper, and that's it.
Memes
An emo kid walked to me holding a rope, and asked: "Do you want to join my family tree?"
What did the rope and the tree say to the kid?
Do you want to hang later?
What do girls and noodles have in common?
They both wiggle when you eat them.
What do you call a dead baby?
Spawn killed.
what did the woman do after meeting up with a rapist?
sue the dating site for matching her with him.
What do you call a gang of emo kids?
Suicide Squad.
What do you call a gay drive-by? A fruit roll-up.
Why do orphans love drinking water? Because they have no milk to drink!
What do you call your Indian best friend who is the ABSOLUTE BEST at cunnilingus? A Curry Muncher.
How do you fit 4 gay dudes on a stool?
Flip it upside down.
What did the cow and bull do for their first date? - Dinner and a Moovie.
What do you call a paralyzed turtle?
Shell shocked.
What kind of shorts do clouds wear?
Thunderwear.
"I bought my little sister a trampoline for her birthday, but all she wants to do is sit in her wheelchair and cry."
One day, I was sitting on my couch watching YouTube when I heard a knock on the door. I opened the door, and to my surprise, it was my dad. I haven't seen him in 16 years, so I let him in. I noticed he had a gallon of milk in his hand, and he went to the kitchen and put the milk in the fridge.
Then he walked towards me and said, "Oh no! I forgot the cereal!" Then he walked out the door and drove away. I never saw him again.