DoS jokes
What show do orphans hate?
Family Guy.
What do you call a stupid meme and a Mexican fighting? Juan on Juan.
So a guy gets a motorcycle with authentic leather seats, and the dealer tells him, "Dude, the rain will ruin the seats. Get it under something if it starts raining, and worst-case scenario, put Vaseline all over the seats to make it waterproof." So he goes to his girlfriend's house that night for dinner, and before he goes inside, she says, "Listen, this is your first time meeting my parents. We have a rule: the first one to speak has to do the dishes." So he walks inside and sees a mountain of dishes, over three months' worth, because no one has spoken, and the stench is awful.
During dinner, he concocted a plan to get someone to speak, so he started doing all of this crazy shit to try and get someone to speak. Not a peep. Eventually, he grabs his girlfriend, bends her over, and starts going to town. Still nothing. The parents are outraged but not speaking because they don't want to do the dishes. After about a minute of this, he walks away and does the same to her mum and starts going to town. Now the dad is pissed and just staring him down with daggers. At that moment, it starts to rain. He remembers his motorcycle is out in the rain, and he grabs the Vaseline out of his pack pocket, and the dad goes, "FINE! I'LL DO THE DISHES!"
What do you call a fat Mexican rat?
Rasmus.
If prostitution had a tax-exempt status, and if an adult bookstore had a tax-exempt status because of a glory hole, churches would have to do something else to keep their tax-exempt status to avoid the risk of going out of business.
How to get quick cash:
Step 1: Kill a child's parents.
Step 2: Do foster care for them.
Step 3: Get paid for doing foster care.
Why do orphans love table tennis? Because that is the only love they're getting.
Crush: "How much do you love me?"
Me: "Well, look at the stars outside."
Crush: "But it's morning."
Me: "Exactly."
What do rednecks and deaf people have in common?
Don’t care wtf you say or listen to shit you say😂
When it comes to bears, of course they always give bear hugs, well what do you call them when they aren't hugging right?
Just barely hugging you! Lol.
Why do orphans hate p*rn hub?
They always see a stepdad and stepsis.
What do you call two Mexicans fighting? Juan on Juan.
You ever get the feeling when your parents are cheating on you? I do.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
Dear Kenya, I am very sorry for how rude I was to you. I just want you to know that I'm on your side and I'll never do it again. - Sincerely, Gwen
Boy: *scares girl*
Girl: "Gosh, you scared me, Jesus!"
Jesus: *Arrives out of nowhere and said, "What is it, human? I got work to do."*
Girl: What work?
Jesus: "Coming out of nowhere when people say 'Jesus.'"
Why do orphans not play Call of Duty?
Because they have to land at houses.
How do you call a man with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.
Have you seen the Woody Allen v Mia Farrow series on HBO? If you like details about child molestation without having to do it yourself, boy do I have the show for you!
"Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"