DoS jokes
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year? Because they don’t have a Mother’s and Father’s Day.
What do you get when you mix a 737 and 767?
A 797.
How do you get more presents from Santa? You tickle his sack.
How do you make Prince Andrew sad? You tell him you're over 16.
What do you call a different spaghetti? An impasta!
PAPYRUS: WHAT DO YOU CALL A DIFFERENT SPAGHETTI SANS?
SANS: What?
PAPYRUS: AN IMPASTA!
SANS: Good one.
Orphan: What are you doing tonight?
Me: Your mum... oh wait, you don't have one.
What do snowmen call snowballs?
Children!
Your forehead is so big that you can see the whole world before you do!
What do you call a Chinese boy throwing poo?
Yung Flung Dung.
What do high school kids and Dow have in common? They both test chemicals.
Q: What are women better than men at doing?
A: Winning arguments.
Q: What are men better than women at doing?
A: Winning swimming titles.
Why do orphans hate playing sports in school?
Because they never get picked.
How do you light up a football stadium? With a football match.
How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?
You pay the ice cream man to keep driving.
Hey, do you remember that dragon thing?
Draggin' these balls across your face.
How do paedophiles greet people?
"How are you, kid?"
What do you get when you cross a cow and the Kool-Aid Man? Donald Trump, cuz of his red face and juicy tits.
Why do orphans start fights?
Because they don't get in trouble at home.
What does 9 and 36 add up to?
A life in prison.
Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!