Why do orphans die young?
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
DoS Jokes
What do you call a retard that got hit by a car? Mashed potatoes.
What are a doctor's and a WWE fighter's ideas on child abuse?
Doctor's: Don't do it, it does not help. Mood behavior.
WWE fighters: If it can crawl, it can brawl.
"Suck me off, daddy, I'm doing homework."
Are you my homework because I’m supposed to be doing you right now, but I’m not.
If you like this post, you will die!!!! Don’t do it 👿😅😎
What do you do when a person with epilepsy gets seizures in the bathtub? Throw in some laundry.
Your mini pecker is so small, the taxi driver said the ride was so short that he'd do it for free.
What do you call a disabled kid on fire?
Hot wheels.
Mom: I'm getting you a dog!
Me: OMG REALLY?!
Mom: Yeah, what gender do you want?
Me:...
Me: Bitch, please.
What do you call a bunch of retarded preschoolers? Tater tots.
What do Americans and Rubik's Cubes have in common?
They both have a history of separating colors.
What do monkeys eat for dinner? KFC.
What do Jesus and a painting have in common?
They hang by nails.
Why do cheetahs always win the race? Because he cheats, duh!
How do Chinese people name their kids?
They throw pots and pans down the stairs.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with milk.
This is why orphans are dangerous with cardboard. They either start eating it or making it into a house and hallucinating that they have a family.
So I threw out the cardboard and said, "You have to stay in reality. Fantasies aren't real. You can't and will never get a home."
Next day, they make cardboard parents, so I threw that away and said, "Pay attention to reality; you will never get parents."
Next day, they start acting like parents and tell me what to do. Again, I said, "Snap to reality. You will never be a parent!" The orphan responded with, "Oh, really?! How so?" I just simply said, "You don't have a house and parents. You literally like eating cardboard, and then you make parents out of it. You like to eat old people!"
Three guys are standing in an alley on an alien planet, and the psycho one says, "However many tits your girl has is how many balls you have!"
The first guy says, "Ha! My girlfriend has six! I'm racked up!" The second guy said, "Eh, I am happy with two balls." The third guy said, "Shit! My girlfriend is flat as fuck!"
A guy listening in enters and says, "Bro, you actually have girlfriends. I do not. Does that mean I have a pussy?"
Why do prepubescent orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”.
