DoS jokes
What do you call the space in between Kim Kardashian's breasts?
Silicon Valley.
What do orphans get at Xmas?
Lonely.
How do you make an orphan's hand bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come back.
Best way to trick your friends:
A brick falls out of a plane.
How do you put an elephant in the fridge? Open the door, put him in, and close the door.
How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? Open the door, take the poor elephant out, put the giraffe in, and close the door.
The animal kingdom is throwing a party, all the animals are there except for one, who? The giraffe, because he's still in the fridge.
Sally needs to cross the river that is known to be filled with deadly crocodiles, but she crossed safely, how? Because the crocodiles are at the party, but Sally still dies after crossing the river, how? Because she was hit by the flying brick.
Customer: "Can I get this in a smaller size and a different color?"
Employee: "Ma'am, this is an adoption agency, you can't do that here!"
What do you call a pencil with no end?..
Pointless.
What do parents and dark humor have in common? Not everyone gets them.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in the year?
Because they don’t have a Mother's nor Father’s Day.
What do a prostitute and peanut butter have in common?
They both spread for bread.
Why do orphans say, "Go big or go home?"
So that way they feel important.
What do you call an Indian with pink hair?
Ghandi floss.
What do you call a group of children who go on strike?
A minor's strike.
What do dark humor and food have in common?
Some get it, some don't.
I decided today that I was going to do something with my life, something amazing, and I decided to punch a homeless man.
Timmy: Stupid motherfucker.
Jimmy: Wow, do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
Timmy: *starts crying*
Jimmy: Ah fuck, I did it again.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell it to clap until his/her parents are back.
Jimmy watched in horror as Alex told the suicidal man to do a flip.
Friend: What are you doing?
Me: Putting peanut butter on my balls.
Friend hears in the distance, "Orphans, I have food for you!"
What do parents and dark humor have in common? Some get it, and some don't.
Why do orphans only have 363 days of the year?
Because they don't have a Mother's and Father's Day.