DoS jokes
What do you call a fat, ugly, and hairy woman with a rape whistle? A feminist.
If you are going to bully anyone, then bully an orphan, because what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Where do orphans get stuff from?
The reject shop.
What do an orphan and an apple not have in common?
The apple actually gets picked.
What do you call a ball with no hair? A Mexican ball.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on a bungy jump?
Spasticelastic.
What do you call Stephen Hawking in a burning building?
Hot Wheels.
Me before: Why do bandanas exist? They're ugly.
Me after seeing your hairline: Oh, I seeee.
Me giving pro tip: Get a bandana LMAO.
Women should have the right to choose whether they want to do cooking or cleaning first.
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal?
Their dad didn't come back with the milk.
Why do orphans love elevators?
They raise people!
Why do orphans never wake up in the morning? Their dad can’t wake them up.
Why do orphans hate Christmas?
Father Christmas isn’t a thing.
Why do orphans hate family-size candy?
Because they can't share it with their family.
Why do orphans hate dad jokes? They never return.
What do you call it when a snowman throws a tantrum?
A meltdown.
What do you call a terrible bus company?
Stagecoach Highlands.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9.
Do you know why 10 was scared? Because he was between 9/11.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Disabled.