Dogie jokes
As a little boy, I walked in on my parents having intercourse one night, and of course, my parents stopped and sent me back to bed.
The next day my dad tells me, "Don't worry son, I wasn't hurting mommy, we were just trying to make you a little sister."
So, when I was young I always wanted a pet. I then looked at my father and asked, "Could you do mommy doggy style next time? I want a puppy."
My dog is pregnant. I'm gonna be a... I don't know?
Ohhh, an owner.
billie: hi.
me: You wanna hear a story?
billie: Yes, sure.
me: Once upon a time, I ran over your dog last night.
I cried when my dad cut up onions. Onions was a good dog.
What can you tell a dog, but not your girlfriend? Come.