An Eskimo was holidaying in New Zealand and while driving his rented car around the countryside it broke down. A bloke passing by offered to help, lifted the bonnet and said, "I know your problem, you blew a seal." The Eskimo with a shocked expression retorted, "Yeah? Well you fuck sheep!"
If a man travels 14 miles to buy a loaf of bread, how long will it take for him to realise that living in the countryside is shit?
What do you call a pig in a farm - a pig in a farm
Q: Why can’t Stephen hawking go to the countryside A: there’s no signal
