Burnside bridge jokes

Why was the Burnside Bridge so hot?

Because it's on the burning side.

Fuck it, suicide is wrong, but if you jump off a bridge and yell "parkour," it's a failed stunt.

If you jump off a bridge while crying, it's suicide, but if you jump off a bridge while screaming "parkour," it's a failed stunt.

What's the difference between that bridge and my will to live? None, they're both too short.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were stuck on an island, and the closest populated island was 100km away. So in turn, they try to swim to the island. The brunette swims 10 km then drowns. The redhead swims 30 km then drowns. The blonde swims 50 km then gets tired so she swims back.

Dad: "If they jumped off a bridge, would you?"

Tommy: "Yes, cuz there would be a body pile to break my fall!"