Break up jokes

What's the fastest way to break up a bingo game in Baghdad?

You shout out, "B-52!"

How do you break up a fight between two gay men?

Say, "Can you get straight to the point?"

Why did the booty break up with the fart?

It was just too much GASLIGHTING.

Why did the parachute break up with the skydiver?

Because it was tired of being taken for granted every time things fell apart.

One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish.

I’m breaking up with you, bitch.

What did the autistic kid say to his girlfriend after they broke up?

"I thought what we had was special!"

The longer the relationship, the longer the breakup will hurt you. Better break up now ooo.🤣

What hurts the most? 😹

A. Breaking up before chewing.

B. Breaking up after chewing.

A brother and sister were hanging out, and the brother was sad, so the sister asked why. The brother replies with, "I think I need to break up with you!"

When you tell your Roblox girlfriend you’re breaking up with her, and then 10 seconds later you hear your uncle crying in the other room.

Why did the emo break up with her boyfriend?

He didn't wanna hang out.

What do you call a Titan who can't swim?

Titanic!

Imagine the Titanic with a lisp. It would be unthinkable. My version is imagine the Titanic with a lisp, it would be unsinkable.

What did the front half of the Titanic say to the other half when it hit the iceberg? I'm breaking up with you.

Doctor Seuss break up lines:

"One fish, two fish, blue fish, red fish, I'm breaking up with you, bitch."

My girlfriend sent “a let’s break up text” right when I was done editing our pics.

Pick up lines.

"One fish, two fish, three fish, I’m breaking up with you, b*tch!"

"Hey there little mister, I’m dating your sister."

"My friend and her boyfriend were kissing until she puts her tongue down his throat, and what happens next is really weird."

The tongue gets stuck in his throat and starts to guh-guh-gughhh trying to get her tongue out of his throat, but it cumssssss out with spit all over his tongue, then they break up because he didn't want that to happen ever again...:/

My girlfriend is so fat that when she runs or walks, she falls, so I am breaking up with you.

🙍🏼‍♀️Fat girlfriend: Nooo, don’t leave me, catch me, ahhh!

🙇🏼‍♀️Fat girlfriend falls on boyfriend: Ahhhhhh *dump*

🙇🏼‍♀️🙇🏼Fat girlfriend and boyfriend: Fat girlfriend: U didn’t catch me wawawawa. Boyfriend: Get off me, 900 pounds, ugh, I hate u!

Story done. Please like.

Why did you and Sarah break up?

'Cause she cheetahed on me.

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I took her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

Girlfriend: Babe, what do you think of our love?

Me: Look at the stars in the sky.

Girlfriend: Aww... it’s infinity, right?

Me: No, it’s a waste of time.

Girlfriend: I’m breaking up with you.

Me: Whatever, when I take out the trash, I think of you.