Patient to doctor: "Will I be ok, Doc?"
Doctor: "I doubt it. Mercury is in Uranus now."
Patient: "I don't do that astrology stuff."
Doctor: "Nor me. My thermometer just broke."
Friend, your mum's fat.
Me: Well, your mum's so fat, she played pool with the planets.
What is the sun's favorite chocolate bar?
The Milky Way!
Why didnβt the moon eat dinner?
Because it was full! π
A: What's the similarity between your girlfriend and the sun?
B: They're both hot?
A: They're both massive.
Where can you find a list of dead astronauts? In the orbituaries.