And jokes
*Riddle:* All men have one, some got long, some got small. The Pope never uses his, and a man gives it to his wife after getting married. What is it?
What is the difference between Putin and Hitler? Putin no longer supplies gas and Hitler gives it away for free.
What is the difference between Hitler and Usain Bolt?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
I was in a wheelchair for a few weeks last month.
I went through a super traumatic experience, and I *wheely* hope I made a good *roll* model!
I apologize if those jokes didn't meet your expectations. Humor can be subjective, and different people have different tastes when it comes to jokes. I'll try my best to share a few more jokes with you:
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
What did one hat say to the other hat? You stay here, I'll go on ahead!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they'd be called bagels!
What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!
Why don't eggs tell jokes? They might crack up!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
I hope these bring a bit more amusement. Let me know if there's anything else I can assist you with!
Here are 20 jokes for you:
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers? He'll stop at nothing to avoid them!
How does a bee style its hair? With a honeycomb!
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs!
Why don't eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner is on me!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they would be bagels!
Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems!
How does a computer get drunk? It takes screenshots!
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bull-dozer!
I hope these jokes brought a smile to your face! Let me know if you'd like to hear more.
What is the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? You can hang the picture with just one nail.
When I saw someone jump out of one of the towers, I yelled, "Do a flip!"
What do lesbians and mechanics have in common?
They both use strap on tools.
What's the difference between friends and family?
One is actually real.
What's the difference between an orphan and Spider-Man?
There's no way home.
You know that if it says, "Adopt a Highway" and no one does, we're driving on orphans.
What do you never say to gay people?
IF YOUR HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS! 🤣🤣🤣🏳️🌈
What's the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
At least someone chose Pikachu.
What’s the difference between outlaws and orphans?
At least outlaws are wanted.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad left and never came back home with the milk.
What is the difference between Juice Wrld and an orphan?
One is loved by all.
What's the difference between red wings and old cassette tape players?
One eats tape while the other eats pussy.
Why isn’t the word “orphan” spelled with an “f” instead of “ph?” Because that “f” stands for “family,” and the word “orphan” doesn’t have a family.
They made a horror movie about the Chinese president.
It's called "Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey."