Absentee parent jokes

Parent: My parents never attended my birthdays.

Birthday girl: Oh wow!

Parent: Anyone missing?

Birthday girl: Your parents.

My teacher said he is gonna call my dad, I can't wait to meet him! 🥰🥰🥰

Why hasn't my dad come back? No seriously, I'm not joking.

My dad left me, lol.

I have no father. Like if you relate.

My dad is like a unicorn.

He's never here. :c

What's the difference between the milkman and my dad?

Nothing, they are both one thing except he never returns with milk.

(I've been eating cereal with water COMBINATION!)