Worst Jokes Ever
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
Because she didn't have any arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Susie.
What's black and white and red all over?
A massacre at a funeral.
RIP Stephen Hawking who was buried today... he did always love black holes.
I guess you could say Stephen Hawking is a dead meme.
What's the best thing about dead baby jokes?
They never grow old.
What do you call a disabled Asian?
Sum Ting Wong.
Why aren't koalas actual bears?
Because they don't meet the koalafications.
You know when you sign up for something and it says "I'm not a robot"? I guess he never had the chance to tick that.
Women's rights.
Smaller babies may be delivered by a stork, but bigger ones need a crane.
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He didn't pay his electricity bills.
How do you get a fat girl to bed? Piece of cake.
I knocked on Stephen Hawking's door, but nobody answered...
All I got was "error 404 page not found."
Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*
Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?
Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~
Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he wanted to.
So, Duracell batteries do run out.
I was talking to this absolutely gorgeous woman, and I asked her, “What do you do?” And she said, “I’m a brain surgeon.” And I don’t know if this makes me sexist or not, but I was really impressed.
Most women can’t pull off sarcasm.
What do French ducks say?
Quoi quoi.
Never invest in funerals. It's a dying industry.
Why are blind people so good at being a Jedi?
They are always swinging a stick.