Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

I went for a job interview today and the manager said, "We're looking for someone who is responsible."

"Well, I'm your man," I replied, "In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."

To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket... You can hide, but you can't run.

My girlfriend accused me of cheating. I told her she was starting to sound like my wife.

I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. -- I'm not really a mourning person.

  • 6
  • If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.

    Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive? -- It was a grave mistake.

  • 6
  • Give a man a plane ticket and he'll fly for a day. Push a man from a plane and he'll fly for the rest of his life.

    If a midget with down syndrome shows up late for work, is it okay to say she's a little tardy?

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  • If sex with three people is called a threesome and sex with four people is called a foursome, I guess now it's clear why everyone calls me handsome.

    Tell a woman she's beautiful a hundred times, and she won't believe you. Tell a woman she's fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.

    If a woman sleeps with 10 men she's a slut, but if a man does it... He's gay, definitely gay.