Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

I would name my daughter Awesome so I can tell people that I'm fucking awesome.

  • 7
  • How did they know that Princess Diana had dandruff?

    They found her head and shoulders in the glove compartment...

    Crucifixion - only one guy who nailed it... at least Jesus didn't get screwed over, but I bet he was pretty cross about being forced to hang around.

  • 6
  • What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

    What do you call a cow with three legs? Lean beef.

    What do you call a cow with two legs? Read the title.

    Stephen Hawking went on a date and came back with a broken leg. I can't believe she stood him up.

  • 1
  • Once there was this Whichdoctor. He walked barefoot most of the time, which gave him impressive calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, and the food gave him bad breath, which made him (wait for it) a Super Callused Fragile Mystic Hexed By Halitosis.

    I know you don’t like rape jokes, but I’m gonna force one on you anyway.

  • 7
  • What is the first thing the disabled download on iTunes?

    "They see me rolling, they hatin'."

  • 0
  • I opened a company selling landmines disguised as prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof.

    Why are Muslims terrible at football?

    Because every time they have a corner, they build a shop.