Worst Jokes Ever
Remember, kids: the school shooter can't get you if YOU are the shooter.
Crush: "How much do you love me?"
Me: "Well, look at the stars outside."
Crush: "But it's morning."
Me: "Exactly."
What movie does an orphan want for Christmas? "Spiderman: Homecoming";)
My school is on fire today, and I pushed a kid in a wheelchair down the stairs and shouted, "Hot Wheels!"
I threw a paralyzed kid into the fireplace and called him hotwheels.
What is it called when an orphan takes a family photo?
A selfie.
I took my mother-in-law out yesterday morning.
Damn, I love being a sniper.
What does Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
They're both turned on by kids.
What did the girls on the beach say to Michael Jackson?
"Could you move? Your sun is in my son."
I'm glad I'm not a pornstar... that would be pretty sucky.
What do you call an orphanage that's not an orphanage?
A homeless shelter.
How to get quick cash:
Step 1: Kill a child's parents.
Step 2: Do foster care for them.
Step 3: Get paid for doing foster care.
Why can black people post offensive jokes about making fun of white people, but white people can't post offensive jokes about making fun of black people? Because white people have white privilege. Does it cycle?
Why are Americans so bad at chess?
They lost 2 towers.
The popular girl told me, "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!"
Two weeks later, she shows up pregnant.
...
I guess her rubber broke too.
Gwen, if you're reading this, the link I sent is for you and your boyfriend to chat and stuff. No one shall bother you! Pinky pinky!
Btw, do you know how I am cause if do then I am related to Kenya and my name starts with T? Don't worry, just chat with your boyfriend.
How do you win an argument against a emo? kick the chair.
Did you know Yao Ming has the biggest penis in Chinese history? It measured in at nearly 5 inches!
Read this slow: I 1 2 4 Q?
It's not that I don't get the laugh, but most of you need to read through what's already been posted, 'cause everybody's saying the same sh*t.