Worst Jokes Ever

I'm listening to a song about fish--it's very catchy.

My daughter said I could never make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!

Cashier: "Will you want the milk in a bag today, sir?"

Customer: "I’ll just keep it in the carton if you don’t mind."

My eggcellent egg yolks crack everyone up.

If you don't like them, you're just hard boiled.

I ate a time machine once, it was very time-consuming. Especially when I went back four seconds.

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel.

I wondered why the ball was getting bigger... then it hit me.

What’s the best thing about 28 year olds?

There’s 20 of them.

What do you call a Mexican that dives into a pool? Bean dip.

What's worse than sucking a dozen raw oysters out of your grandmother's cunt?

Putting in 12 and sucking out 13.

Chuck Norris destroys the yo mama!

What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?

Impossible!

How did Princess Diana cross the road?

Through the windshield!

Life is like giving head... it always sucks.

What did Google Translate say to Siri?

"Why are you so Siri-ous?"

What do you call black people in pool?

Coco Pops.

1 + 1 = window.

What did the man say to the woman? "Make me a sandwich."

Here's a joke... you.

I went to a seafood shop.

I pulled a muscle.