Worst Jokes Ever
Yo mama so stupid, when her phone dies, she buries it.
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A nectarine.
You wanna hear a joke about my penis?
Never mind, it’s too long.
What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?
Beef strokin' off.
More like so they can fuck him, am I right?
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food? Microchips.
This is the biggest joke ever - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5j-BH_WdBXdzeoOdG2v2dA
So, two condoms walk by a gay bar. What does one condom say to the other? "Hey, wanna get 'shit-faced?'"
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable (A), beautiful (B), cute (C), delightful (D), elegant (E), fashionable (F), gorgeous (G), and hot (H)."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Your mama is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it said "Damn!"
What's worse than Aaron with Down syndrome?
Aaron with a rope.
Why does Adam go hockey, you might ask?
In my opinion, he shouldn't go because he is bad, but he needs the armor to protect himself from his own step-dad.
What's terrible? Three dead babies nailed to one tree.
What's worse than that? One dead baby nailed to three trees.
Freshman: Hey, what's better, Ford or Chevy?
Senior: I don't f**kin' care as long as it drives.
Freshman: So, I'm guessing it's Chevy?
What do you call a sad cup of coffee?
Answer: Depresso.
Why did Aaron's dad beat him? Because he tensed his ass.
Why was Aaron's mum sad? The bus missed Aaron.
Why does Adam buy airsoft guns, you might ask?
To defend himself against his own father... his life must be shit.
Once there was a boat. Its friends said,
"It's time to come back." And the boat said,
"No way. I don't give into pier pressure."
What did one brain cell say to the other brain cell?
"I think I feel a connection!"