Why was the ocean so blue? Because the island never waved back.
Worst Jokes Ever
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
According to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground, but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don't care about what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black.
Some people ask why jokes exist. I say, when a mommy and daddy love each other very much, they have sex, and they make another one of you.
What do you call people that make retarded jokes?
You.
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody nose.
What is a pirate's favorite letter? You might think it’s the "R," but it’s actually the "C".
What did John Cena say to the blind man? "YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
I used to work at a calendar factory, but I got fired because I missed a few days.
Why did the guitarist go to prison?
'Cause he fingered A minor.
I have fun going on them roller coasters that go really high up and sitting by random people, and once we get to the high point, I look at the stranger and go "wham" and unplug their seat belt.
When the phone is ringing, Dad says, "If it's for me, don't answer it."
What's the hardest thing about walking through a field of dead children?
My penis.
Why did the kid named Jeff become gay? Because he grew up without a father figure. Hahaha, I love dark humor!
I saw a bicycler flip over a gutter. It was pretty grate.
I asked my rigger buddy if he could tie me up later, he said, "I'm a frayed knot."
Why did the blind man fall down the well?
He just couldn't see that well.
What's thick, 12 inches, and in your mum's throat?
My penis.
He asked for a shot of beer?
He got shot and killed.
So, I was fucking my daughter the other day and my wife walked in... I don't know what was funnier: the look on her face, or that the abortion clinic let me keep her.