Worst Jokes Ever
The other day I lost all my crayons.
I just wish I had a shoulder to cray on.
How do you recover from prostate cancer surgery?
It’s all Depends!
What's the difference between a Demon and a Redhead?
The Demon at least has a trade offer.
A young boy is in a tepee with his father, just after his sister's naming ceremony. Curious to how it works, he asks his dad, "Father, why is my sister's name Tulip?"
His father responds, "That is her name because a tulip was the first thing she saw when she first opened her eyes."
The boy was still puzzled. "What about big brother Sparrow?"
"His name is Sparrow because a sparrow landed on him when he first began walking."
The boy finally asked how he was named. "Well, we decided to name you the same way as your sister."
The boy nods with understanding, "Thank you, father."
"No problem, Two-Dogs-Fucking."
Why did the girl fall off the swing?
Coz she had no arms, bants!
The morbid jokes on this site.
What does a dead baby look like?
I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.
What do the names Alan and Jordan have in common?
An.
Women’s rights.
Where do whales get weighed?
The whaleway station.
Bants ahahahahahahahahahahhahahahashahahhhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Why didn’t the turkey cross the road?
To prove that he was not chicken.
When you mix a wizard, a rabbit, and a songwriter together, you get 24 carrot magic.
How long does it take a baby to cook in the microwave?
I don't know. I close my eyes when I masturbate.
Why did the murderer invest in condoms? To kill the future buyers!
What’s the difference between a baby and a refrigerator?
The refrigerator doesn’t squeal when I put my meat in it.
What’s the difference between Jimmy and a normal kid? Jimmy is fat.
A man gets an email from his doctor.
"Sorry for the delay on getting your prescription, it'll be at your house tomorrow."
The man thinks to himself, "Oh shit! Then what have I been taking?"
I like my women how I like my wine.
14 years aged and locked in a cellar.
What do you call a policeman/farmer?
A farmer in blue!
What do you call a malignant cell in Paris?
A Royale with cancer.