Worst Jokes Ever
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!
So, I was fucking this bitch, right, and I thought I had AIDS.
So I go and get tested. Turns out I did get AIDS. Now what I'm wondering is where the hell does an eight-year-old get AIDS?! I guess my sister needs new friends...
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.
Yesterday I asked my friend, "What is a fish without eyes?"
They replied, "I don’t know."
I said, "Fsh."
Oof, you're gay!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Who.
Who who.
You sound like an owl.
All these oranges, but you're still the one for me.
What's Hitler's favorite Yu-Gi-Oh card?
BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON
Hey updog!
What's updog?
(Laughter)
Yo mama like a penny: two-faced, worthless, and in everybody’s pants.
What did the guy with no teeth say to a blind guy... "How many fingers am I holding up?"
Who am I sitting next to?
Your mom gay.
What do you call dynamite on steroids? - High Explosive.
"Nahtzee"
Why couldn't the T-Rex clap?
Because he's dead.
What is Jay?
Phat.
What died on 9/11?
2,996 people.
Brian was shopping at a mall. He hopped onto an escalator. Next to him were two people having an argument. Eventually, one of them pulled out a pocket knife threatening to stab the other. Brian murmured "Well, that escalated quickly..."
Monkey: What ya doing?
Other monkey: Just you know, "hanging around."
Bad joke, right? I just can't think of something amazing. It's like my brain is "hanging."