Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

What did the man's dick say to the man?

I just can't "hand"le it!

Did you hear about the tomato and the lettuce race?

Well, the lettuce was ahead, and the tomato was trying to ketchup!

Me: (pointing up in the air) "Everybody listen up, this is a robbery!"

Girl: "Dude, this is a library."

Me: "Oh." (screwing on a silencer)

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  • My brother finally got his driver's license, so he took our new car out for a spin.

    At least now I can have his phone he left.

    Why should you never fart in an Apple store?

    Because they have no Windows!

    Did you hear about the person who got hit in the head with a soda can?

    Good thing it was a "soft" drink!

    How Stephen Hawking died: he drove too far away from the wall and the cord got unplugged.

    Muslims don't need weed, they've got the Koran.

    You burn that sh*t and you're gonna get stoned.

    When people mean "phat feast," they don't mean fat.

    When yo mumma says "phat," she means FAT but thinks she's cool!

    What’s the difference between a teenage girl and a cat? One’s a psycho and the other is a cat.