Worst Jokes Ever
Our family is known for unusually sloppy diarrhea.
It runs in our jeans.
What do you call a grey, fat, and very old unicorn?
A rhino.
Yo mama's so poor, I knocked on the front door of her house and realized I was already outside in her backyard!
Q: What's the difference between a folk singer and a 14" pizza?
A: The pizza can support a family of four.
Will Will Smith smith?
Yes, Will Smith will smith.
Why did Johnny not like the audiobook he got for his birthday?
Johnny was deaf.
Why did the blind man fall into the well?
He couldn’t see that well.
Have you ever had Ethiopian food?
Don't worry, neither have they.
What happens when a frog parks illegally?
It gets toad.
Even though you are a meateater, you can still totally be a vegetarian.
"I think Hannibal Lecter is soooo sexy... I'd like him to eat me!"
What happens if you mix a dick with a potato?
You get a dictator dic-dick-tator-potato!
What's the best thing about fucking 21 year olds?
There's 20 of them.
What do you call a goat?
A goat.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Apaches.
Apaches who?
Apaches on your eye.
Once I saw a mirror... and that was when I got the ability to become a ghost.
Why did the otter cross the road?
To get to the otter side.
I recently saw a pun contest in NYC. The owners said there was a maximum of 10 puns that I could submit. I wrote 10 puns and submitted all of them in hopes that at least one would win--however, no pun in ten did.
Girlfriend after sex: How did you get so good at eating pussy?
Boyfriend: My mom taught me.
Why will we never get hungry in the desert?
We have lots of sand-which's.