Worst Jokes Ever
What was the Roman Empire cut in half by?
A pair of Caesars.
Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the street?
Because it got stuck in a crack :)
I asked my zombie boyfriend, "Does he have a brain?" Because he's stupid asf.
There was a costume party on Halloween. Everyone was there except one guy. Many people asked his brother where he was. His reply was, "Oh, he wanted to be our dad for Halloween."
Robyn Olive in 10.
Eli Tremain.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh f-i-s-h (and the eye).
How do you drown a blonde? You tape a mirror to the bottom of a 13-foot deep pool.
What do pigs and ink have in common?
They both go in a pen.
How do you know you’ve been robbed by an Asian?
The house is clean, the homework is done, but the idiot is having trouble backing out of the driveway.
How do you get a nun pregnant?
Dress her up as an altar boy.
I went to the market to get eggs, and my sister thought that I meant my balls.
What is the difference between a school bully and a feminist?
The school bully does not hide behind their computer screen.
billie: hi.
me: You wanna hear a story?
billie: Yes, sure.
me: Once upon a time, I ran over your dog last night.
When did I wake up?
At the quack of dawn!
A man lost his left arm.
He's all right now.
Friend 1: I HATE YOU!
Friend 2: *cries* b-but i-i didn't s-say that!!
Friend 3: *writes on paper with pencil cuz is so bored*
Me: *points at pencil lead* NOW NOW NOW THIS HAS *LEAD* TO SOME SERIOUS FRIENDSHIP LOSS! Plz shut up.
All my friends: *groan at horrible pun*
What would good be if it was a place?
It would be a desert because it had too many droughts!
My friend made a joke about dogs. I said it was a RUFF joke.
kys