Worst Jokes Ever
What is a tree's favorite thing to drink?
Root beer.
Josh
What did the diver say when he was trapped in seaweed?
- Kelp!
A horse walks into a bar. Several people get up and leave, realizing the potential danger in the situation.
Need an arch? I Noah guy.
What's worse than funny condom fails?
Jake Paul.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite song?
Deja Vu.
During the election campaign of 2012, we heard about Obama, but we thought they said Osama. So I told my friend, "Grab his gun and let's have some fun." So during one of Obama's campaigns, we both shot him to death, which lasted a while.
Then my friend said, "Let's go get piss drunk at Mavericks bar." Then on TV they talked about Obama's death, and everybody but 2 guys cheered. Then guess what, we loaded our guns and lit those 2 guys up like we did to Obama.
What’s the difference between a bullet and a prostitute? They both burst a barrel.
What season is it when you're on a trampoline?
Spring time!
Jack: Hey Josh!
Josh: What?
Jack: Sex!
Josh: Huh?
Jack: SEX!!
Josh: I don't get it.
Jack: Exactly ;)
Why does shit come out your asshole? Cause fuck you, that's why.
What’s the hardest part to eat of a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
I like my women how I like my cigars: 7 years old and coming from Cuban in a burlap sack.
Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
Because it died.
What do you call an owl that does magic?
Hooodini.
I went outside to catch some dog, but I mist.
what do you call a drunken sailer?
arrested.
My grandfather says I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
I couldn’t quite remember how to catch a boomerang, but eventually it hit me!