How can you light up a candle in a ship which does not contain any instrument and you are alone with just a packet of candles?
Answer: Just throw one candle in the sea; the boat will become lighter.
Worst Jokes Ever
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender said, "Why the long face?"
What are a pedophile"s shoes called?
Answer: WHITE VANS
Women are like grenades: you pull the ring and BOOM, the house is gone!
I used to work at a candlestick factory, but only on the wickends! It was illuminating!
The granddaughter wanted to see granny. She killed herself.
Ur dad lesbian.
Ur sister a mister.
Ur family tree LGBT.
Ur family reunion a homosexual communion.
How does a butcher keep his tent up in the wind? Steaks.
Your face is a joke.
Why did Steven Hawking die?
He lost Wi-Fi connection and didn't get the data plan.
What's the difference between a Ferrari and 100 dead babies?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.
What does DNA stand for?
National Dyslexic Association.
Who are the fastest readers?
911 victims. They went through 88 stories in 7 seconds.
I like to eat mom's spaghetti. Now try it with the NEWWWW VEGETTIIII, turn any vegetable into pasta!
Adam and Eve had sex. It was paradise.
Knock knock! Who's there? It's Dave! Dave who? Dave proceeds to break down crying at the realization that his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.
Poopy loopy.
How do we know that Princess Diana had dandruff?
Because they found her head and shoulders in the glovebox.
What is the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
The reason Stephen Hawking died is because he drove too far away from the wall; the cord unplugged.