Worst Jokes Ever
Why did Stephen Hawking cross the road?
Oh wait, he didn't.
My daughter is the most adorable little girl in the world. She's got my sister's eyes.
Why did the mermaid want to go to the evil monster so it could get a real joke? Ha, ah, ah, ha!
What's the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don't set the skeleton on fire.
Your mom gay.
Why don't bulls play archery? They might hit a bulls-eye.
Why aren’t koalas actual bears?
They don’t meet all the koalifications!
Did you hear about the guy who got his left side chopped off?
Well, he’s all right now!
What is your arm's favorite military branch? The army.
From the wise words of my friend, "You ain't a man 'til you had a man."
Teacher: "People with depression never get anywhere in life."
Student 1: "My mom has depression, but she died."
Student 2: "My sister has depression and she's going to therapy."
Student 3: "My dad has depression, and he's doing REALLY well."
"Dick me down shorts."
A police officer said to a belly button, "You're under a-vest."
I recently found out that my grandma died. We did an autopsy, and the results came back. They were pretty shocking.
We found out that she died............... from an autopsy.
What type of file do you need to turn a 14 centimeter hole into a 40 centimeter hole?
A pedophile.
What did Sally say when she was stuck in the water with kelp?
"I need kelp! KELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP"
Cancer.
I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.
What's the difference between 13 dead babies and a skeleton?
There aren't any, there's 13 skeletons in my closet.
What did Yoda say to Luke during his wedding ceremony?
"May divorce be with you."