Worst Jokes Ever

Why did 1 eat 2?

'Cause he was hungry.

I get more care packages than Africa.

Do you need an ark?

Because I Noah guy!

What does Stephen Hawking press after he's had a hard day?

F5

Why does Ella have cancer?

Because she’s stupid.

I’ve never had Indonesian food. Huh...

Neither have they.(:

Two scientists walk into a bar. One says, "I want h20." The other said, "I want h20, too." The second scientist died.

I knew this one guy who liked to swim with the fishes, then the mob got a hold of 'em...

I'm thinking of getting a job as a gardener--pushing up the daisies!

Do you wanna hear the gossip about butter?

Actually, I shouldn't spread it.

What type of bees give milk?

Boob-bees.

There was a Cheerio that had a job. He worked hard at it, and the boss came up and promoted him to the vice president of the Cheerios. So he needed a speech. He kept practicing and practicing and now he was thirsty. It was almost time for his speech, so he went to the drinking fountain, but there was a huge line. So he went to the lake, but he saw tons of garbage and what he thought was a cereal killer. So he found this bowl of punch, but he realized... there was no punchline.

Chuck Norris: "I block bullets with my beard." Abraham Lincoln: "I catch bullets with my skull."

Why did Hitler's girlfriend break up with him? He Hit-ler.

Yo mama is so poor, I saw her kicking a can and I asked her what she was doing and she said moving.

What is the difference between a refrigerator and a baby?

The refrigerator doesn't cry when I put my meat in it.

fdfds.

Q: What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant?

A: On The Border.

What do you call someone who farts in public? A private tutor.

What's the difference between me and an egg?

An egg gets laid.