How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree?
You wave at him.
Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the bike fall over?
It was too tired.
I love how all these jokes about different accidents have happened, but why isn't anyone writing about how much of an accident we all were?
Two mums hook up!
Their daughter comes in the room and says, "Which one's the baby daddy?"
The "mum" points to the woman who was actually a man!
What is the difference between a snow woman and a snowman?
Snowballs.
So I got these new shoes, except they were from a drug dealer.
Now I don't know what they were laced with, but I was trippin' all day.
Gay guy?
Poo poo packed, lol.
Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, "I'm hit! I think I've lost an electron!"
"Are you sure?" asks the other.
"I'm positive!"
What's black and has wheels? Black wheels.
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex, sex, sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."
Caley's life.
What turns a girl on more than having sex with her?
When she finds out that you have a vibrator too.
My dick actually destroyed the Death Star.
I have a skeleTON of jokes, but none of them are very humorous.
What do you call a candle in armor?
A knight light.
My friend was annoying me with bird puns. I realized toucan play at this game.
What's the a simulation between a penis and a Rubik's cube?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
Why did Mary fall off the swings?
She got hit by a refrigerator.
Do you know what the similarity between a penis and cucumber is?
They both have cum in it.
Yo momma is so ugly, when she tried to join the ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals!"