Worst Jokes Ever

Two times four is eight, now stop f***ing asking me!

мy naмe ιѕ jeғғ.

Why is the sun red today?

The sun turned red today. Here's why. As an enormous Atlantic storm batters Ireland, a related phenomenon is turning heads further east over in the United Kingdom. ... Just like the way sunsets are sometimes red, excess particles in the atmosphere can change the color of the sun in the daytime.

You know the song "Getting Drunk on a Plane"? It was written by the pilot of the Lingard Skinner pilot.

Why was 6 so afraid of 7?

7 killed 6's parents.

A person asks a taxidermist what they do for a living. The taxidermist replies, "Oh, you know, stuff."

I mean I'd tell you a joke about the pizza I ate, but it's just too cheesy.

I put peanut butter on my asshole so the dog would lick it, but instead I got bit by ants.

What does the child with no hands get for Christmas? Unknown. He hasn't opened it yet.

What does a homeless man in New York get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

I love breakups. My ex-girlfriends always end up in pieces.

Dad fucked Mom.

Mom fucked son.

Son fucked sister.

Sister fucked dog.

Dog fucked cat.

Cat fucked bird.

Bird fucked fish.

Fish fucked Dad.

Dad really liked it!

Knock it out, you poo-a-loo, go get your loo.

A slag is like the first piece of bread in a loaf. Everyone touches it, but nobody wants it.

Karolien's life.

What do you call diarrhea from a hot woman? Chocolate milk.

What do you call diarrhea from a fat woman? Arsenic.

I once read a book on antigravity, it was impossible to put down.

I'd like to relish the fact that you've mustered up the courage to ketchup to my level.

What's the difference between a grape and an elephant?

I don't know, what?

They are both purple except for the elephant.

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Depends on how high your ceiling is.

I'd love it if you killed yourself, but Hitler killed himself and people still hate him...