Worst Jokes Ever

What does a kid with cancer and dark humor have in common? They never get old.

What do you get when you beat up an autistic kid?

Mashed potatoes.

My dick said that your ass is having a boner.

I told my friend to look at the clock, then I said, "Is this a bad time?"

"Knock Knock..."

"Who's There?"

"Kenya"

"Kenya who?"

"KENYA OPEN THE DOOR IT'S FREEZING OUT HERE!!!!"

Three good friends decided to meet in their favorite caffe.

The meetup was a successful one, because they all enjoyed themselves.

What’s the difference between me and cancer?

My dad didn’t beat cancer.

I am cool.

Hahahahahahaha!

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I will never forget my girlfriend's last words... "Get off of me! STOP!" *slurp*... Dead.

I wonder why the baseball was getting larger and larger, then it hit me.

If somebody cuts their leg off and hits you with it, would they be kicking or hitting you?

A fly is 6 inches above water, and a fish sees it and it leaps out and gets the fly. Then a bear grabs the fish and eats it. Then a hunter shot the bear, and a mouse saw some crackers and then leaped on the cracker and ate it. Then a cat runs down to get the mouse, trips, and falls into the water, and that's the story of how six inches can get a pussy wet.

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red Ferrari?

I don't have the Ferrari.

Why can't an orphan go on away games?

Their parent will never show up!

Why do people eat bananas? Because it's a-peeling!

Q: Why can't dinosaurs clap?

A: Because they're dead.

What do you call a redneck on fire?

A fire cracker.

Knock knock. Who’s there? Mimi. Mimi who? Mimi’s got cancer.

What is red, bubbling, and scratching at a window?

A baby in the microwave.