Worst Jokes Ever
What do you get when you cross a Muslim in a trench coat and a duffel bag?
A sad news story.
My life, lmao.
Friend: My girls are like boomerangs; they always come back.
Me: Mine DON'T :(
This is funny.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
What makes you think feminists can change anything?
"Puta, banana in your ear!"
Two men walk into a bar, and they both hit their heads.
Tuxedos suit you.
I wanna go to Antarctica, but then I got cold feet.
A family of three, a dad, a mom, and a 12 year old son are driving in the car when the dad says, “How about we play a little game of two truths and a lie? It’ll be fun.”
“Ok,” the mom and son reply happily.
“Let me start,” says the son.
“Ok, go ahead,” replies the mom.
“I hate video games, I hate school, and I love junk food,” says the son.
“Ooh ooh! You do love junk food, you do hate school, and you don’t hate video games.” Says the mom.
“You’re right!” He replies.
“I’ll go next,” says the dad. “I love your mom, you’re adopted, and my dad almost died in WWII.”
“Hmm... Your dad did not almost die in WWII, obviously I’m not adopted, and you do love my mom.” Says the son.
“The lie isn’t that you’re adopted,” says the dad.
What’s the difference between a feminist and a rock?
A rock can break a glass ceiling.
What is dumb, yo mama, you dumb stupid idiot?
What does the cell ride to work?
A vesicle.
Wanna hear a funny joke?
My life.
Why couldn’t Billy go to school today?
The bus driver hit Sally.
Solicitors are more likely to harass someone with a “no soliciting” sign on their front porch.
Sometimes I look in the mirror and go, "What happened?"
What do you call a dabbing cow?
Udder savagery.
Why does Doctor Pepper come in a bottle?
His wife died.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't f***ing matter, it's still not f***ing coming.