Worst Jokes Ever
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Dad!
Dad who?
*Silence*
Dad: "Son, does mommy like having lady-friends over?"
Son: "Nah, mostly men."
Dad: "Do you think you'd be comfortable telling that to a judge in court?"
My dad told me that his dreams were shattered a few years ago.
Then I asked him how many years ago.
He replied with, "When were you born?"
My happiness.
T-Series.
A joker held the door open for me the other day. It was a nice gesture.
Where did Susie go after the bomb exploded?
Everywhere.
What do you call a hot Mac Book Pro?
A Mac Daddy Pro.
A married woman gets hit by a truck, and the cops tell her husband:
Cop: "Sir, it looks like your wife's been hit by a truck."
Man: "I know, but she has a great personality."
How do you get a Pikachu on a bus?
You poke it on.
abcdef ghijklmnop qrstuv.
Why do I call my dog a vibrator?
Because every time my dog acts like a dildo, I beat him, and when I beat him, he shakes. What do you call a shaking dildo? A vibrator, therefore I call my dog a vibrator.
Why did the Mushroom get invited to so many parties?
He was a fungi!
"Why am I ugly?"
Google would like to operate your camera.
All my life I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to achieve something.
Now, after messing up my life at every possible chance, I finally realize that what I really want is to have been someone after following through with one thing.
I'd make a joke about Noble Gases, but I probably wouldn't get much of a reaction.
What's the difference between an air blower and Little Boy?
When the air blower blew, it did not wipe out Hiroshima.
I guess that corn is a-maize-ing.
How is Stephen Hawking dead?
His Windows shit down.
What bird doesn’t need a comb?
Bald eagles.