Worst Jokes Ever
My great grandfather died in 9/11.
He was an amazing pilot.
My friend once said my opinion didn't matter. I said, "Why did you call me a female?"
Q: A guy walks into a bar, what does he say?
A: Ow!
How did Sally die?
She got shot.
How did Sally die?
She got shot.
How? She could not run away.
My friend's name is Campbell, so she must love soup.
A farmer told me that he wanted a couple of acres, so I punched him in the teeth.
How many times can 46 go into 8? Just hop in the van and find out.
Knock knock.
A joke.
U.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The butt.
The butt who?
The butt goes mooooo!
What do you call a fish that smokes? "A puffer."
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer.
It never gets old.
After the holidays, Ron asks Hermione: "How was the weather in Spain?"
Hermione: "No idea, it was so foggy I couldn't see a thing!"
What's the difference between a mother and a pigeon?
One doesn't eat their husband out.
What is red, green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?
...A girl scout that got hit by a car.
My grandpa is an asshole. The fucker deserved to die. The son of a bitch was using his life support, and I needed to change my iPhone.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get ran over by a truck.
Did you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Well, neither did she!
Have you ever seen a baby unicorn? No! Because unicorns are gay rainbows in equine form.
Why did Ross fall off the swing?
Because he had no arms.