Worst Jokes Ever

What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.

Why do emos cut themselves?

To play noughts and crosses.

I read a story about a rabbit being raised. It was a hare-raising tale!

Can't wait for the orphans to have their family reunion! Wait...

I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad's half sister.

How does the dog dance?

He doesn't... he's dead.

Okay, so basically I'm monky.

My penis is on fire.

What does Kylie Jenner feed her baby? Plastic MILK! LOL

Hello.

I'm late for my interview! Do you know where the nearest sex offender registry is?

What is a tree's favorite thing to drink?

Root beer.

Josh

What did the diver say when he was trapped in seaweed?

- Kelp!

A horse walks into a bar. Several people get up and leave, realizing the potential danger in the situation.

Need an arch? I Noah guy.

What's worse than funny condom fails?

Jake Paul.

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite song?

Deja Vu.

Yo mama is so stupid that she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W's.

what do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a hot tub?

steamed vegetables.