Worst Jokes Ever

Why did the little girl flush herself down the toilet?

Because she wanted to join the Brownies.

With a poke-poke here,

And a poke-poke there,

Here a poke, There a poke, everywhere a poke-poke!

After all the mudslides in the area, the streets became a mudder out there.

Yo mama's so hot when she walked into Subway she gave me a foot long!

Girl: "Come over."

Orphan: "I can't."

Girl: "My parents aren't home ;)"

Orphan: "Just two things I don't have."

I put my fish on a leash so I could teach him to walk. Then I took him out for a walk. Then, when I put him back in the tank, he stopped moving.

I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.

I had the best butterfingers yesterday.

I dropped it.

I moved all the Bibles to the fiction section because there is no God, as said Stephen Hawking in 2011, but in 2018, God said there was no Stephen Hawking.

When Stephen Hawking falls, who does he call, the ambulance or the technician?

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs?

Because he fell off his wheelchair.

I was about to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.

Why did the man yell at the other? To tell a pun.

What is Bill Gates’ favorite equation?

1 + 1 =

What do you call a kid who's been kidnapped?

Well, her name's Sally, so I guess... Sally. My main concern is getting her out of the freezer.

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

Because he lost Wi-Fi connection.

So I stayed at my friend's house for a few days, and I was like, "OMG, why?" So, I am going home because I’m going to my best friend's house.

What’s my favorite Islamic Holiday... 9/11.

My friend died from an allergic reaction. He gave me an EpiPen while he was dying, so now I have something to remember him from.

My mom has a policy where if you kill a butterfly, no butter for a week, and if you kill a grub, no grub for a week.

She killed a cockroach today. I have some bad news for her.