Worst Jokes Ever
Two men are next to each other. One looks at the other and asks, "Are you a fascist?"
The other man responds, "No, why would I be?"
The first man pulls out a gun and says, "Are you sure?"
The second man says, "Never mind, I am a fascist!"
I got my little girl a hand sewing kit for her birthday and she cried. I didn't understand why until I realized that she had no hands to sew with.
What is a cow's favorite water sport?
Ca-MOO-ing!
What's that useless skin around the vagina and the boobies?
The women.
Yo mama is so fat that when she put on a yellow dress, people called her "taxi."
Why did the Mafia cross the road?
Forget about it...
Dodo.
I am a motherfucker.
Why are mountains very cold?
Because they are very cold.
I lost my bag. :(
What do you call a Krispy Kreme Donut combined with a Big Mac from McDonalds?
A Krispy Kreme Mac.
When a lady gets married, what does she borrow?
She borrows her husband's last name.
A boat carrying red paint and a boat carrying blue paint crashed into each other. The crews were marooned.
All germs are from GERMany.
What do you call a homosexual in a coma?
A fruit and a vegetable!
What's the grossest thing ever?
A bag of dead babies.
What's even more gross?
The bottom one is still wriggling!
My water was leaking, so I used Flex Tape. Now I don't know where to shower.
A man went to the doctor, and the doctor said, "What happened to you?"
The man replied and said, "I broke my arm in two places!"
Then the doctor replied with, "DON’T GO BACK TO THOSE TWO PLACES!!"
What time did the man go to the dentist at? Two-thirty.
That one person who can never bring a smile to your face...
Until you push them down 3 flights of stairs.