I am Wayde, I like ranga balls, please cum in my ass.
Worst Jokes Ever
My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.
But I knew she’d come crawling back to me.
What are Mexicans' favorite sport?
Cross-country
Person 1: I heard oxygen and magnesium went on a date.
Person 2: OMg!
9/11
What's a lesbian's favorite type of food?
Finger-food.
A man got fired from the first coin factory. He exclaimed, "No! This is the only thing that's ever made cents!"
Here’s my pun.
Yup literally nothing... jeez this was pretty plain.
Chuck Norris doesn't ride horses.
Horses ride him.
Ever since I needed a wheelchair, my husband has been so rude. He’s been pushing me around and talking behind my back.
When I was a kid, I used to read a lot. I mainly grew up reading stories by Shakespeare, especially the story Romeo & Juliet. That one in particular taught me a valuable life lesson. It taught me to not be surprised when my girlfriend killed herself.
What is Beethoven's favorite vehicle?
A van.
Two mates walk into a bar.
Mate 1: "Shit! Look at that spider over there!"
Mate 2: "Whateverrrrrrr."
Mate 1: "No, seriously, it's bloody massive!"
Mate 2: "(Turns around) Shit, that's huge, I thought you were joking."
Mate 1: "No, I'm Fred King, Jo King's brother ;-)"
What did the Olympic Swimmer call his son?
Paul.
A father and a son were painting pictures together. The son and father were drawing the exact same thing to a T, and the son said, "What happened to your hand?" looking at the scar tissue near the father's knuckle. The father replied with, "You know what happened, you were there." The son continues to deny this until they both finish their paintings. They're exactly the same.
The father passes out for a few hours and wakes up to find that there's only one painting.
You know you're ugly when you get handed the camera every time your friends have a group picture.
What's the best part about having emo grass?
It cuts itself!
What is big, annoying, and full of blubber?
90% of America's population.
Why didn’t the construction worker build a bridge?
He was scared to get across.
Q: How do you make a 9/11 cocktail?
A: Light two Manhattans on fire and then knock them over.