Worst Jokes Ever
This is my fidget spinner, I got it in my Easter basket.
Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.
Your mom's my dad. Think about that!
So Santa fell down the chimney, but it was a lit chimney...his name's no longer Santa. It's Crisp Cringle. Pls send help :)
Why'd the snake cross the road? It was in the chicken's butt.
Why can't bugs drive... because they don't have a LICE-ens...
BA-DUM CHHH!
Me: Hey, wanna know my spirit animal?
Friend: Sure.
Me: Roadkill, because I can see my mom pretty clearly now.
Friend: Wait, aren't you dead?
Me: Aren't you my son?
Friend: So that's what Mom was trying to hide from me.
Why can't Miss Piggy count to 70?
Because when she gets to 69 there's a frog in her throat.
I just came up with a really good deaf people joke! The great thing is that they won't be able to hear it!
Why are women like diapers?
They’re usually full of shit, but thankfully disposable.
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
I had a joke about pizza, it's just too cheesy.
What do you call a dick that's too small to see?
Tick-tack dick.
The joke is me.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
The 9/11 victims, they went through 700 stories in 10 seconds.
One day I saw my friend in a hospital bed. He told me to call 911. Instead, I called his parents.
Stephen Hawking walking, oops, he does not do that anymore.
Stephen Hawking walked to the shop.
I lied 😄
Friend: Why don't you cut your hair?
Me: Dunno, but I'll probably cut my wrists first.
This guy walked into a pizzeria and ordered a water. The owner called him an idiot.
His girlfriend walked in and ordered a pineapple pizza.
The guy left her, and the owner made her leave.