Worst Jokes Ever
I like my women how I like my cigars: 7 years old and coming from Cuban in a burlap sack.
Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
Because it died.
What do you call an owl that does magic?
Hooodini.
I went outside to catch some dog, but I mist.
what do you call a drunken sailer?
arrested.
My grandfather says I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
I couldn’t quite remember how to catch a boomerang, but eventually it hit me!
What is it called when a cow sings? A lawsuit.
What do you call a clock on a belt?
A waist of time.
How did I kill Georgee?
I snatched her boat! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!
A pedophile brings his eight-year-old daughter to the doctor's office. The doctor asked her if she would like some candy? Her father replies, "Please, no more candy for her. I gave her enough today."
Stage 4 cancer is like a woman. You can’t beat it, but if you do, she’ll probably come back again.
What do you call a girl that likes reading? Page.
Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
My father is like Houdini. When he heard his girlfriend was pregnant, he disappeared.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to his job at KFC!
Did you know that the shovel was a groundbreaking invention?
Loser.
If you turn the word "racecar" backwards, it says "racecar".
But if you turn the racecar sideways, you have Paul Walker's blood on your hands.
My mom gave me a golden shovel and a hoe. I said, "Why do I need this?" She said, "That you every year."