Why couldn’t Billy go to school today?
The bus driver hit Sally.
Why couldn’t Billy go to school today?
The bus driver hit Sally.
Solicitors are more likely to harass someone with a “no soliciting” sign on their front porch.
Sometimes I look in the mirror and go, "What happened?"
What do you call a dabbing cow?
Udder savagery.
Why does Doctor Pepper come in a bottle?
His wife died.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't f***ing matter, it's still not f***ing coming.
Two men walked into a bar, and one man asked for H20, and the other man asked for H20 too.
Only one man came out alive.
He he he.
Yo mama is soooooo fat that she was arrested for carrying 10 pounds of crack!
Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying 10 pounds of CRACK.
Don't bully. Lol.
Roses are red, I like weed,
If you say yes then I'll do a "good deed."
Why did Grampa pass out? Because of diabetes.
I did not want to join sailing, but my friend roped me into it.
Q: How did Stephen Hawking die?
A: He lost internet connection.
Did y’all hear about the increasing divorce rate because people are addicted to Fortnite?
They’re just two weeks to quit.
I was talking to my old friend. They said, "We should hang out more!"
I said, "You mean we should ketchup?"
I walked out of the electronic store and saw a midget carrying a big screen TV all by himself. He looked like he needed a hand, so I offered to help.
He said, "This is not a big screen TV, it's a Kindle!!"
There is only one thing I have to give my enemies.
A bucket full of dead baby heads and semen so they can replenish their spawn.
My teacher told me, "You have no idea how powerful this quote is." I looked at her and told her, "You don't know how powerful the shotgun in my bookbag is."