Wanna hear a joke?
Feminism.
Wanna hear a joke?
Feminism.
Why was the obtuse angle hot?
It was more than 90 degrees.
Me: I must have a mirror in my jeans, 'cause I see you in my pants.
People are making apocalypse jokes like there's no tomorrow.
What happens when you cross a pig and karate?
A pork chop!
My dad told me to do what he did best, so I left.
Guns control.
New horror movie idea.
The main character loves anime. The killer yells "Omae wa mou shindeiru." The main character instinctively yells back "NANI???" and is killed.
Chuck Norris gets pulled over by a cop, and the cop gets a ticket.
Hello friken world shitytytytytytyt.
What do world hunger and a Mercedes have in common?
Princess Diana couldn't stop both of them.
I was walking by a prison when I saw a midget in an orange jumpsuit climbing down the fence. When he hit the ground and sneered at me, I said, “Well, that’s a little condescending.”
Why can't Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
'Cause he'd walk up the stairs!
Three cowboys are at a fire talking about the best things they have done.
Cowboy 1 says, "I have taken out a whole group of raiders with my bare hands."
Cowboy 2 says, "I have killed a herd of bulls with my thumb."
Cowboy 3 chuckles as he mixes the fire with his dick.
A skeleton goes sky diving. Doesn't come back in one piece.
A blind man walks into a bar.
And a chair.
And a table.
How do you clean ash off a stove with chemicals?
What do you call a bunch of bi-racial, retarded kids? Mixed vegetables.
What's the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus's birth date.
My mom is the jelly, and my dad is the peanut butter. And I am the bread, the only thing keeping them together.