Worst Jokes Ever
Spaceballs: The Comment.
Why did Stephen Hawking make it to heaven?
He couldn't make it up the stairs.
Stormtrooper: What happened to the Jedi Order?
Palpatine: Slew it!
Stormtrooper: What happened with your garden?
Palpatine: Grew it.
Stormtrooper: What should I do with this guide for my test?
Palpatine: Review it.
When you send your girl a dick pic, but she says it's small, so you text back and say:
"Enjoy the little things."
An Irish man walks out of a bar. It can happen.
What does a Tusken Raider eat after his meal?
Some desert!
What did a jockey's manager say to him before the race?
"Use the horse!"
What's the difference between a dead baby and a slice of pizza?
A dead baby can't feed a family.
Cancer is like a video game.
Some people cannot beat it.
Get up, you lazybones!
Back in ancient Greece, there was a Greek Skyrim, but instead of FUS ROH DAH, the main character said, "Me damnit, Ganymede, get the #10 lightning bolt, I hate it when Helios lets his kids drive!"
If you don't get this, look up the story of Phaethon, and if you STILL don't get it, then you are dumb.
We are gonna crush you in the try not to laugh.
Have you eaten at the restaurant on the Moon? It's got good food, but no atmosphere.
A boy is sitting in a dentist chair getting braces, and a dentist comes in and says, "Brace yourself!"
I used to date a girl named Ruth, but she broke up with me and now I am ruthless.
Son: Hi Dad, I'm Son.
Dad: Hi Son, I'm Leaving You.
Years later:
Dad still did not come back.
Your mama is so stupid, she went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
The Windows XP log out sound.