What if some kid was like, "I'm going to shoot up the school!", and then someone just pulls up with a reverse card?
Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the little girl's ice cream melt?
She was on fire.
I've got 99 problems and one of them is that I count my problems instead of solving them.
What's the difference between calling someone dad or daddy? How you come from his balls.
Your dad's penis was chopped off at the age of 2.
What did the sand say when it got into a fight with the ocean?
"Oh my God, you're such a beach!"
Your Da.
What's the difference between $1 million and baby teeth?
I don't have $1 million in my wallet.
TFW you're having sex with your German girlfriend and she won't stop telling you her age.
So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.
That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.
A man is walking on the deck of a cruise ship, when he sees a woman, without arms and legs, crying. The man says "What's wrong?" The woman says "I've never been hugged before." So, the man gives her a hug and walks away.
The next day, the man sees the woman, on the deck, crying again. The man says "What's wrong, now?" The woman says "I've never been kissed before." So, the man gives her a kiss and walks away.
The next day, the same thing occurs. The man says "Oh, for Christ's sake! What's wrong, this time?!" The woman says "Well, I've never been fucked before." So, the man picks her up, throws her into the ocean, and yells "YOU'RE FUCKED!"
What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car?
"How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"
Don't leave us hanging, Sayori.
Chuck Norris can make an omelet from Kinder surprise.
When Chinese babies are born, they should put a sticker on their forehead saying "MADE FROM CHINA".
Why did the guy get the hose?
Because the girl was smoking hot.
Yeoooo.
TikTok
Yo' mama is so stanky, her Sure deodorant got confused and her Secret deodorant told on her.
When pigs went to the desert, they turned into bacon.