Worst Jokes Ever
Hey Evan, this is Dad. Ya, I’m still not home.
This guy goes to the doctor and says, “I think I’m a wigwam, no, I think I’m a teepee, no, I must be a wigwam, no, a teepee.”
The doctor tells him, “I think I understand your problem. You’re two tents.”
Why did the mushroom go to the party??
Because he was a fungi!
I went to China and said, "I have a big cock," so they thought I said they look like a cock. Then I realized I said it in English.
What job do you want if you don't want people's twos since?
A Catholic priest.
Why do people name a kid "Rob?" Because they want him to rob a bank so they could adopt new kids to lock in their basement for a late-night toy.
Why do orphans have phones?
Because they don't know how to call home.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Olive.
Olive who?
I love you!
Yo, Rob, you forgot to pay me cause you sucky sucky my thang.
AKA, you're up for adoption.
Rob, you forgot to pay me for letting you sucky sucky on my thang.
AKA you're for sale.
Ooh, I wonder what's on this browser. *clicks* "How to tell your kid they're adopted."
Evan, yo mum rode on my big PP love, dad.
I congratulated my friend on losing all that baby weight. She started crying and told me I should make them for miscarriage like that......
The second twin tower is like Canada. It doesn’t exist.
When it's cold outside, men can cut ice in three places.
It squirted in my eye, God dammit!
Try to make a joke, but not about yourself.
Well, I have nothing.
What does Santa say to 3 girls in a row?
HO HO HO
"Send me back, I never liked you."